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Frog knocked at Toad’s door. “Toad, wake up, he cried. “Come out and see how wonderful the winter is!” “I will not,” said Toad. “I am in my warm bed.”
No more emails. If you want something from me you must approach me slowly and calmly with a piece of apple or carrot in your palm with your fingers flat and extended so I do not bite them
The fry up was always my favourite page. RIP Raymond Briggs.
girls want only one thing.... to live in the middle of a forest and never be seen again
Woman in a cafe with a puppy (to a mum with a baby who is staring at the puppy): Would she like to stroke the dog? Mum: Yes I think so. The baby stokes the dog. Mum: She loves dogs. Then the baby strokes the woman's boob. Mum: Sorry! She loves boobs too. Woman: It's ok. So do I.
“If you see me on my daily walk & I’ve got headphones in, please take that as a ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign.Otherwise…I have to take my gloves off to pause my audiobook & I miss a bit & have to rewind, which really interrupts the flow of a Le Carré, & that really is my ‘Me Time’. Ok?”
slapping “all my best” at the bottom of an email
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