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white people simply cannot believe khruangbin
pam bondi is JESTERMAXXING and currently being FRAME MOGGED by the house judiciary committee. she’s experiencing VISIBLE CORTISOL SPIKES as she continues to get FACT MOGGED while PERJURYMAXXING. zero composure gains, getting RECLAMATION MOGGED every 45s for FILIBUSTERMAXXING
the shower is the alternate dimension where I realize I'm low on shampoo but as soon as I step through the curtain I'm transported back to this dimension where all my memories are wiped like in severance and I won’t remember i’m out of shampoo until im back in the shower
I cant stand these millennial tech companies with these 'cute' nonsense names like "granola" or "clay." if I had a company youd see me calling that shit the American Computing Corporation. National Electron. United Tabulation. thats a name with some chest hair
type of shit I been on
This miller lite of mine, I’m gonna let it shine
Beginning to grasp the ideological roots of SEC fans
The Confederate States Army would have rolled any contemporary European army like a barrel.
This actually occurred to me at age 20 after I ate a bag of mushrooms and took 20 bong rips but I'm glad they are finally doing the math
🚨: Nobel prize winner physicists, Roger Penrose says the Big Bang was not the beginning of our universe, rather it was the end of the previous one
I'm seriously starting to question the credibility of the FIFA Peace Prize.
Brock Purdy is a white boy with incredible motion and an impeccable dougie Here’s what it taught me about b2b enterprise sales 🧵👇
[Deep South tobacco CEO voice] Now ah, this here ah, Bowsuh charactuh... enlighten me as to hhwhy Mistuh Mario's got such animus for the boy
If Shrek was real he'd agree with me politically, you fucking moron. You fucking imbecile
The thing about Pink Floyd is they take a lil while to start singing
You know someone’s 28 when they say merry chrysler
Hey man we’re making the Yuletide gay later if you wanna pull up
These 23 year old fitness influencers who “quit drinking” are frauds. Ma’am. You barely even started. You didn’t even give drinking a chance. You didn’t quit. You never started. Stolen valor.
This man is my brother.
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