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"Tourist: Is this 99 Main Street?Resident: No, it's 66, but we turn it upside down to confuse people."
What's the hardest part of milking a mouse ? Getting it to fit over a bucket !
What do you get if you cross a telephone with a fat football player? A wide receiver.
Who makes a million dollars a day?Someone who works in a mint.
Did you hear about the ghoul's favorite hotel? It had running rot and mould in every room.
Q: Why are conductors' hearts popular for transplants?A: They've had little use.
Why do goalkeepers spend ages on the Internet?Because they can't stop saving their work.
Why did the bee started talking poetry ?He was waxing lyrical !
"Your momma is so fat that her measurements are 26-34-28, and her other arm is just as big!"
What will fall on the lawn first? An autumn leaf or a Christmas catalogue?
How is a judge like an English teacher?They both hand out long sentences.
How did the footbal pitch end up as triangle?Somebody took a corner!
Jury: Twelve men and women trying to decide which party has the best lawyer.Justice: A decision in your favor.
Fred: What's that terribly ugly thing on your shoulders? Harry: Help! What is it? Fred: Your head!
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