Vay

A knee-jerk response to any stimulus is a bias defending itself (and leaving you vulnerable). Own it. Make it yours. There is a 50% chance it will go away. Another 50% it will stay. Your only guarantee is that you'll be deeper and more present for it - however that may look.

As we unwind our biases, it may initially seem as if we're losing something. Allegedly, these biases allowed us to manage our lives and get stuff done. In fact, unwinding a bias only means we get rid of the compulsion to run it. We get to own it, instead of the other way around.

We can play to our strengths in life and get everything we're supposed to want. And then we can also get whatever's next too. Past a certain point, it becomes obvious the only thing we truly want is our own presence. The personality that got us here... we now have to unravel.

When we first step into the world on our own, developing an ego is fantastic. In cognitive terms, an "ego" means playing to the strengths that our biases lend us. Bluntly put, that means finding how our pre-existing biases get us laid and paid. (hopefully not at the same time)

Internal reference is cognitively about you. External reference is about shared reality. Also, you're making them up - from the same place. The more you realize this, the more fluently you move between them - always getting exactly the information you need to take the next step.

We're also modeling out dissatisfaction, by the way. We can't help but do both. Just like we can't help but need both rest and challenges. A fulfilling relationship invites us to own our capacity for both in more extreme ways - until we stop being defined by the dichotomy. Love.

In a fulfilling relationship, our cognitive biases get satisfied - modeling out satisfaction for the other person's unconscious. And vice versa.

With strong chemistry, nothing works the same way twice. The perfect circumstance for love to thrive and be rewarded.

I post here, aiming to break patterns in the reader. Today, I feel loved, and I'd like to pretend there are no more patterns to break. There always are, and love demands you face them. Lightly, playfully, with a bit of sadness. After all, you're losing who you thought you were.

Chemistry between people is a double-edged sword, and you need to use both edges. Makes sense, right? Most of us have a "favorite edge" nonetheless. Even when we can't tell which one is which. Are you using your sword to create art, or are you arguing over which edge is better?

Chemistry, platonic or romantic, is when you project your unconscious patterns on someone willing to own that side of themselves. If you're not aware you're projecting - it becomes "codependent". If you are aware of what you're missing - it becomes a dance.

One reward of loosening up your cognitive biases - you become more persuasive and influential. You can match every bias and be liked, and then mismatch it with intent to take them (and yourself) deeper. Not many people can appreciate the beauty in this practice. Underrated.

Love the one that complements you, and you'll love yourself deeper. Love yourself, and you'll be able to love them deeper still. It is a game of leapfrog.

Just because you're introspective doesn't mean you're introverted. There are PLENTY of introverted dummies that take everything at face value. There are also a fair few extroverted people that value meaning. Although, granted, we don't always look it.

The point of identifying unconscious patterns and cognitive biases - is to also notice the pure consciousness that both energizes them and is also a backdrop. That is the only way this ever works.

Most entrepreneurs figure out what you want - and then sell it to you. Stimulus - response. Visionaries tell you what you want before you know yourself. They interrupt the knee-jerk loop and show you new parts of you. They make it so brand loyalty = loyalty to your deeper self

Two ways for marketers to make money off of you. 1) Make you less present, more predictable - then milk you. (99% of marketers fall here) 2) Make you more present, less predictable - then meet you there. (1% of them, at best) Who are you buying from?

As your cognitive biases weaken and you're able to perceive more - a funny thing happens. You clash with fewer people, and yet you also vibe with fewer as well. Past a certain point, the connections you create only exist because... you are creating them. Incredibly powerful.

The physical/spiritual cognitive bias is likely underrated, because it challenges people's preconceptions. Frame it as "openness" in Big 5, or sensing/intuitive in MBTI - and it's recognized. While the spiritual realm is the only true reality - we still access it via cognition.

If you take working with cognitive biases to an extreme, one pitfall is developing a materialistic view of life. Not because it's inherent to the field, but because it doesn't seem to involve spirituality. Except of course it does. Physical/spiritual is a cognitive bias too.