I look like I'm 3 months pregnant but It's only because I decided to eat gluten and cheese yesterday... do I keep eating these things so I can con my way into priority parking?!?!


DK reposted

Love Is Blind > Too Hot To Handle RT if u agree


trying to figure out if having another redbull will help me or hurt me....#taxseason


Monday: *Starts Glee S1E1* this is stupid. Wednesday: *Glee S1E6* THESE ARE MY CONFESSIOOONS


Me: *drinks Timmies coffee* ... wait... this tastes like Samosa. Hailey: *chokes on her turnover*


Low key almost bought five pets yesterday online and then remembered my husbands allergic... might have to sell him.


Ms. to Mrs. in 26.5 hours


five more days until the beach, five more days until the beach


Finally starting to get my life in order... maybe 2020 really is the year for everyone who doesn't wear glasses.


now looking for jobs that let me eat and cry from the comfort of my own home


Exactly the mood I needed 🙏🏼


18 hours, 25 minutes and 42 seconds into my 36 hour cleansing fast and I've only caved once for a small piece of chicken 👍🏼


I've been trying to learn German for god knows how long and the only thing I've learnt how to say is "Ich bin eine Frau"... it's true but like come on!


The only person I need to follow on Twitter is @chrissyteigen , everyone else is just fluff #sorrynotsorry


DK reposted

“any plans for the weekend?” me:

Netflix_CA's tweet image. “any plans for the weekend?”
me:
Netflix_CA's tweet image. “any plans for the weekend?”
me:
Netflix_CA's tweet image. “any plans for the weekend?”
me:
Netflix_CA's tweet image. “any plans for the weekend?”
me:

Hear me out... a food truck that sells Oatmeal called "Rolling Oats" #patentpending


*BIG SIGH*


more espresso, less depresso


two espresso coffees at the same time finished in 2 hours. Starbucks gods I'm ready for my final hour. #deathbyespresso


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