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I recently got a new air conditioner and I cannot tell you how long the guy tried to sell me a smart thermostat. "I literally want the dumbest thermostat you have. Mechanical if they still make them." "But.." "No."
my friend is 6'5" and told me something thrilling and disturbing once. he said whenever he takes the train during rush hour, he sees the same few other 6'5" guys' heads poking out of the morass of people, like treetops. they have a special 6'5" guys nod and everything
😂 how very Frog and Toad of him
I stayed at an airbnb last year that was a beautiful old barn, but I thought it was a huge fire hazard and showed my kids the escape routes and warned them all, and everyone rolled their eyes but it burnt down last week with people in it (everyone ok) lol and lmao
sometimes when I don’t want to pay the $100 therapy copay I go to my friend’s house and talk extra loud until her husband who’s working on his psych PhD goes “do you mind if I say something”
🧵 1️⃣ When my in-laws booked their flight to Berlin (which would be their first trip abroad), my husband and I told them, “We can get a cheap flight or train ticket to almost anywhere. Where in Europe would you like to go?” Without hesitating, my father-in-law said, “Lorraine.”
please put the headphones jack back on phones I am at the doctor's office and the whole waiting room is full of grown men watching tiktoks out loud and it's taking all of my energy to not start screaming
The biggest culture shock of travelling is finding out that the majority of the world don’t got addresses
I was teaching a class 'How to love your neighbour who is sad'. To illustrate 'secret sadnesses', I shared that our dog has just died, and started to well up a bit. One girl came up to me afterwards, looked me in the eye and gave me a piece of paper. "This is for you," she said.
I'm going to be banned by one of these. A huge trend in gaminng is to enable kernel-level-anticheats, which allow games to read your system and look for cheating programs on your system. The catch is they don't necessarily have to be active or even for that game. They can just…
Apparently in Hawaii if you let a bus merge ahead of you the driver can press a 🤙🏻 button
okay but fun fact the reason i was finally referred to a doctor for endometriosis (after going to a million obgyns over the course of a decade) is that i had a physical therapist who felt around my stomach and was like "there's a whole lot of scar tissue here that's not normal"
i got pulled over & my vape was in my cup holder & the cop was like “u know the news saying those things are killing people” i laughed a lil bit & said “they say the same thing about yall lol” he ain’t laugh
Go to an old cemetery. See all the baby graves from before the 1950s & 60s? After that, hardly any. That's when people started vaccinating their children against deadly childhood diseases. If you're unsure what to do to protect your kids, the answer is literally written in stone.
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