Agent_Redfield's profile picture. You know the zombie apocalypse? I help prevent that. @AshleySeaverFBI is my wife and best friend- and my partner. [18+]

Chris Redfield

@Agent_Redfield

You know the zombie apocalypse? I help prevent that. @AshleySeaverFBI is my wife and best friend- and my partner. [18+]

Hey you. Wash your fucking hands. [THIS MESSAGE IS SPONSORED BY THE B.S.A.A.]


I’m just warning you. I’ve seen it happen. I don’t want it to happen to her.


Hardly. A zombie? No. He’s a phoenix, Kennedy. If I get wind of a riff between you two? I’m sending that bird after you.


*Oh that’s a tiny grin on his lips.*


Oh see, he’s not with the BAU anymore. Former fed. But he’s been through more than any of us sad saps.


I could call up Ashley’s federal friend, and he can do that job better than me. So no. I’m not.


Don’t make me regret going easy on you, Leon. I don’t want my soon-to-be brother-in-law being forced to find flat pancake clothes because I beat his ass.


I’ll call that a compliment. I’ve also got a wife to be with. Don’t be stupid, you two. Got it?


. . . You two are a bunch of scared kids.


…don’t break each other’s hearts. That’s all I ask.


Claire? Just- let me say my piece. It’ll take…two seconds. Ish.


I hear you and Claire finally decided to pop the question.


....thanks for making my sister and other best friend relive their first zombie hell, guys. Assholes.


Boo, Kennedy.

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At least I have soup and crackers as my dying meal.


THIS IS HOW I DIE. NOT TO THE ZOMBIE STRAINS. NOT TO GUNSHOTS OR KNIFE WOUNDS. BUT THE FUCKING FLU.


Chris Redfield reposted

Soooo my husband is mega sick with this flu. And I told LEon and Claire to stay away until he's over it since he still could be contagious. I swear. For someone as big and hulking as @Agent_Redfield is...he can be brought down easily by the itsy bitsiest little flu bug.


*Cut to Chris curled under sheets. Moaning.* I HATE THE COLD.


CAN SOMEONE PLEASE MAKE UP THEIR MINDS ABOUT MY FACE AND MY VOICE, THANKS.


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