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I've went back to struggling so much, it been 2 days but already feel like I've dropped so far, I'm not even half way through this uni semester
Just crashed and burned my phone interview, all I want is a summer placement, just one, I can't keep failing
I can be surrounded by people I call my friends but still feel alone, depressed and like an outsider
I feel the worst I ever have, l barely sleep and when I do it's a terribly vivid nightmare, I'm eating less, I'm doubting myself more and more every day
I just can't do anything, I'm at the lowest point I think I've ever been
After cutting people out my life I feel better, stronger too it's sad though cause I thought they were special
My thoughts and feelings are mixed, I feel numb, hurt, alone, I just I'm not stable anymore I'm dissociating to the point nothing feels real, I don't know if I'm happy I'm this way cause I won't get hurt or if I just want to feel loved again
It scares me that some people try so hard to give me support and yet I'm still having these thoughts, still unhappy, still contemplating
Been thinking a lot about men of late - not in a sexy way, but maybe in a kinder way given the amount & kind of responses from writing the below. Please look after your heads the same way you're encouraged to look after your biceps. #InternationalMensDay theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2…
I've woken up I'm stressed I'm upset I'm tired, I feel like I'm being crushed by everything
I can't help but feel horrible, sad, alone and tired of everything whilst also feeling numb to others actions
I break a little every night, I've been trying so hard to pick myself up but now I've given up, I go from numb to feeling everything at once
Just let me drift away and die, I'm tired of everything in life, just let me hide away and let the world pass me by
I'm so done with you! You just use me all the time when you don't have anyone else, I'm always there but then you throw me away every time!
Everything has been so bad today, my family are fighting again, uni work is piling up, fell out with my best friend, life is shit
Honestly I never thought I could but now you've pushed me so far I'm done with you
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