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BorDante

@BorisKal

follow my poetry @ boriskalpoetry on insta

Don’t you just love it when your sneee forces a fart


Always an exciting year when the French start bringing out the guillotines


Ok so when are we getting cocaine bear 2?


“If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn’t. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn’t be. And what it wouldn’t be, it would. You see?”


What’s going on with Honking birds

This is a cassowary, widely considered to be the most dangerous bird in the world, particularly to humans



Just watched a dude walk into the elevator, going to hit his floor, hesitate, whisper to himself “man, fuck this shit” and then just walk out. What a champion


Classical Music has no reason to slap as hard as it does


Pro tip: don’t listen to H.P Lovecraft readings while working


Can an astrology person tell me please why the solstice has me so fucked up today


I just got called Miss by a cashier 🤨🤨🤨 I have many questions


Paddy Considine, Olivia Cooke, and Matt Smith all getting snubbed for a golden globe nom is ludicrous. At least Emma got their well deserved recognition


Where does one usually find the will to live? Asking for a friend


Someone explain to me why all of my ads everywhere are for diamond rings? Hello? I’m lonely?


Wednesday being a superb show is the best surprise of 2022


Claire Foy opening up season 5 of #TheCrown 🔥🔥🔥


One day after work I’ll hurl myself into the East River, just as a treat


Can some crystal girl tell me which planets have been fucking with me all my life?


I’m hearing my coworkers talk about HotD and mispronouncing every single name and giving AWFUL takes. It’s taking every fiber of my being to not run over there to hit them with the “AcKhTuAlLY”


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