Cody Spenillo
@Codyspen
Semi-world famous for killing two bears. Married to @laceyspenillo
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Watching the Steelers offense is like watching a spider try to climb out of a bathtub
Before watching Hamilton, I had no clue that king George III was so hilarious. He gets such a bad rep for wanting to colonize America but nobody remembers his comedic genius
It took a pandemic for people to figure out how to use the entrance/exits at Walmart
Everyone trippin over these murder hornets need to chill. All we gotta do is have beekeepers show American bees the video of Japanese bees fighting off murder hornets so our American bees can learn their tactics. Pandemic avoided
How is it safer to make people wait in lines together outside the grocery store than to just let people in the grocery store?
I’m going to give away $30,000 to 1 random person who retweets this tweet AND follows Twitter Philanthropist @Pulte and Me!! (If you don’t follow us, we can’t DM you the money) Will show proof! Much love
For $500 bucks I’ll give the coronavirus to someone you despise
People don’t like to talk about the benefits of climate change, but the best benefit by far is that ice cream shop will be open year-round. JOBS! JOBS! JOBS!
Congrats to @JimmyJohnson on joining the @ProFootballHOF! I wonder if @AdamSandler knew he had two future Hall of Famers in the stands watching Bobby Boucher in The Waterboy?
In the past 3 months I fixed my hot water tank and my furnace. I had no prior experience with either but I figured it out. It can be very frustrating when things break but figuring out the problem and fixing it is a more rewarding feeling than I can explain
3 days before Christmas my furnace stopped working I guess this is an early Christmas present from my house. Buy a house they said, it’ll be great they said...
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