I only drink one type of Soda, and it's Dr. Pepper. You will never find me associating with any beverage with less than an MD or PHD.
I would follow myself if I could... just to see all the smart shit I think up.
And for those of you who will say scores only go to a 5, ask the college board how they had to create a new scale for yours truly.
It's cute to see everyone so happy about 5's and 4's on the AP tests. I scored a 10.
I can start a bonfire with nothing more than psychic energy. It's amazing what you can do with the other 90% of your brain. #GeniusPerks
Farewell to Sam Weaver, an extremely talented "Jack of All Trades" who will be furthering his scholastic studies at St. Olaf. #FellowGenius
I will be answering any questions that my plethora of followers has for me today. Feel free to ask me your simple minded questions.
I wish the best to the one man who has come closest to being my intellectual equal, Jeff Herrala, in the US Air Force. I'll miss you brotha.
I must leave for an urgent trip to Russia. I will be returning in August once I finish saving the world from a cataclysmic fall-out. #Peace
I've created the first prototype for the iPhone 5 in my garage. It is powered completly by photosynthesizing microbes. #youimpressedyet?
Playing Monopoly means unskillfully maneuvering finances in an inelastic economy. #NotAmused
Twitter emailed me today. They increased my character limit to infinity. I guess what I have to say is too important to limit. #GeniusPerks
So I guess it's classified as rude to scream #YOLO down the hallways of an Elderly Home. I do it anyways, YOLO!
The worst part about losing hair is knowing it was stolen by fairies who intend on using it for their own personal gain. #MagicalFlowProbs
If I were to delete my Twitter account, the mean intelligence quotient for the remaining twitter community would arbitrarily approach zero.
I used to go out running in order to stay in shape. But then I realized I can cure any cardiovascular disease I may contract. #GeniusPerks
Life is like a roller-coaster with all kinds of ups and downs. False: I have only experienced ups... #MCFstandards
@Crain_Flow genetically engineered mice to grow human ears for his 4th grade science project. I just made a valcanoe
I've heard some rumors saying that I'm the second coming of Christ... I will neither confirm or deny these statements at this time.
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