CrocsandaSubaru's profile picture. Dad, ham, dog advocate.

Charles D

@CrocsandaSubaru

Dad, ham, dog advocate.

A big argument with my 5yo just ended with me shouting “well sometimes farts have poop in them!” and us both bursting out laughing. These are the days.


Wait I thought Averman wrote ‘We are the Champions’??


Spindrift won’t call me back about my idea for a Banana flavor. 😡


A cat comedy club called You Gotta Be Kitten Me


Daniel’s a whiny bitch for a tiger.


New England has a sweet spot when you need neither a humidifier nor a dehumidifier. It’s a golden 8ish weeks starting in August that makes the rest of the time worth it.


Are people pissed at trump? I can’t tell…


Rudolph milks the underdog angle for a guy who’s literally the most famous reindeer


The real test of a millennial’s mettle is getting the grandkids on the family plan


I feel so betrayed. I just found out how many calories are in chocolate covered pretzels.


I’ve been a Halloween party this year. Does that mean I get to start watching Muppet Christmas Carol now?


More often than not, the reason I go places is that there might be snacks there.


The hole in the middle of a chapstick makes me feel like I’m rubbing a little butt on my lips


I catch a lot of guff for “Love on Top” being my favorite Beyoncé song. Also for using words like “guff.”


My finance guy wants to to invest more in blue chip stocks, but the yellow corn chips just taste better to me 🤷‍♂️


I was gonna have a midlife crisis this year, but 2025 said, “oh you think you’re special?”


Thanksgiving this year is gonna be one for the ages #leftVright #thunderdome


I wonder if Triple X was also really good at tic tac toe? Like on top of being an extreme sports junkie.


It’s a crime that ‘dillydally’ is accepted by spelling bee, and ‘lingual’ is not.


They say you’re not supposed to eat in the last hour before you go to bed, but instead of snacking less, you can just go to bed later!


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