when there’s lightning and your head guard doesn’t let you close...
When there’s a kid drowning in the pool. Sorry, I jumped in yesterday
When patrons ask if you can turn the music down. Lol no, but you can turn your attitude down
There will literally be lightning striking the pool deck and people will come to the pool with the nerve to ask if we’re open.
If you lifeguard at the same pool as your ex is it acceptable to drown them orrrrr???
The other day my headguard was standing by the side of the pool with his arms crossed and I asked him what he was doing and he says “tryna see some ass” 😂🙃
When I first started lifeguarding I felt like I did so little that I was stealing from the pool now I feel underpaid yet I barely rotate on time and let the kids do whatever
Day 64959 without sex: I volunteered as victim and accidentally choked on water and liked it
Today during swim lessons this little girl grabbed my butt and said “I touched your big booty butt!”........ #lifeguardprobs
While teaching swim lessons you’ll either have the worst baby fever ever or it’ll be your best form of birth control. There’s no in between.
If it’s summer and y’all are still coming to the indoor pool please reevaluate your life
Me: *only washes hair on days off* *and sometimes not even then*
I’m that one guard that won’t stop freakin eating. The most sacred part of my day is packing my snacks for work 🍗🍕🌮🥨
15 minutes up, 45 minutes break.... I could get used to this new job.... #lifeguardprobs
Hey guys! Sorry that we’ve been a little MIA.... but we’re back and ready as ever!...... to BS our way through summer.... #lifeguardprobs
I just want to watch house. Why is it not on Netflix
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