EricMasterBader's profile picture. I'm here, I'm que.... sorry, wrong page.

Eric Bader

@EricMasterBader

I'm here, I'm que.... sorry, wrong page.

I’m still kind of amazed that penises don’t smell like pickles


Question about Christmas presents. Can dog shit spoil? #HolidaySpirit


I don’t have any friends


Fuck it. I’m better off bitter


It’s weird to be in a room of ppl you grew up with and not talk to 98% of them.


So exactly how blind would you go if you continuously masturbate too close to the tv!!?? Asking for a friend


Happy Birthday Molli Bader! Love, your family!!! #sbcubs


Happy Birthday Molli Bader! Love, your family!! #sbcubs


Fuck it, I'm back!! *doesnt tweet again until 2018*


Blocked again by @chickmcgee1. You'd think someone who works in comedy would have some sense of humor.


I feel like if I could just hang from my feet for an hour to let the snot drain from my head I'd be in a better mood


Tip of the day: Google "Gumjob" and turn the lights down low


Oh my god, President Trump. We are living in a fucking episode of the Twilight Zone


Sometimes I wish I had the time to try and be Twitter famous again ...


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