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Wife: "Is Bali [the cat] in the garden?". Me: "Yes". Wife: "The lights aren't on!". Me: "They should have come on automatically nearly an hour ago." Wife: "I turned them off". DOH!
Having quite a relaxing Sunday afternoon 💛
I've just been permanently banned from reddit. My crime? Mentioning that Wing Commander Guy Gibson of the Dam Busters RAF squadron had a pet black labrador called Nigger. Apparently history is now regarded as hate! #redditisshit #fuckreddit
Just watching the Live Aid concert on it's 40th anniversary. Sade was on and i commented that she wasn't wearing a "vest". I got all sorts of criticism! My sense of humour has been constant all my life and i clearly no longer belong in this humourless, piece if shit world.
So good to hear that companies in the UK are already hiking their prices on the basis of tarrifs that not only haven't happened yet but haven't even been threatened. No opportunity to make loadsamoney is ever spurned. Bastards!
So, Alexa perks up this morning: "One new notification, from Amazon shopping, three shipments are due to arrive today". So, I start singing: "I saw three shipments come sailing in, come sailing in, come sailing in ..." Wife shouts at me for being stupid. No sense of humour!
Can some of my lovely 😻 followers retweet plz 🙏
Breaking news: FC United of Wrexham are proud to announce the signing of Mr @michaelsheen. Thank you Michael we hope you love the shirt 😃💜 #FCUtdOfWxm #MichaelSheen
I just heard that apparently my ex-wife is dead. My current wife met up with an old friend she hadn't seen for some years who used to work with my ex. I need to find out when she died and how. For me, she'll always be as she was when I last saw her 30 years ago.
Desperately seeking Daina. If you're still out there, please get in touch. I miss you so much.
The idiot who invented panties/knickers should have been sent back to the village he came from. It's such a travesty to cover up something so beautiful!
Bit deep and lots to read .. but cool people maketh best friends in my .. eyes x…
I ordered 4 shopping bags from Amazon. What I got was 6 pairs of white tights age 7-8. Sent them back and reordered. Can't wait to see what arrives today!
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