Kill List Intern
@KillListIntern
Intern for the POTUS, responsible for all baseball cards and kill list meeting logistics. So blessed to be doing this! Email: [email protected]
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I think Biden napping during these meetings might mean Terror Tuesdays have jumped the shark.
Wow, such a powerful prayer of blessing from POTUS before Terror Tuesday kicks off!
I'm starting to believe POTUS really will create a baseball card for staffers who reveal spoilers on Mad Men Mondays. #TeamPeggy
Saddens me to see what a burden these killings are on POTUS, but he has to do them— there are literally no other foreign policy options here
You’d be surprised how well some Pad Thai really complements a session of whack-a-terrorist. Can’t do baseball cards on an empty stomach!
By vote, POTUS is now allowed to play “Eye of the Tiger” while mulling over which Muslims he wants to kill. Gives a good vibe to the room!
I think the tasteful clipart I found for today's PowerPoint is really going to make it pop! POTUS loves a classy presentation. #Obama2012
Apparently that sourpuss Biden thinks it’s inappropriate to do a drumroll before announcing the assassination lotto winners. #nofunJoe
Wow, so inspired today to see POTUS consulting Aquinas & Augustine on the morality of posting kill cam footage on YouTube #Obama2012
LOL @ my buddy John Brennan farting right in the middle of our “kill or maim?” vote! #goodtimes #greatmemories
Nice: POTUS has on his fav red tie for today’s assassination roundtable. Gonna get good up in here! I bet al Qaeda’s #2 is going down again.
IMO “drone” is such a drab word for what are actually super awesome flying robots! #Obama2012
Oh boy, you should see how giggly POTUS gets when I put the kill lists in Comic Sans! #Obama2012
Not sure why haters see the term “kill list” as macabre. It’s just this little inside jokey thingy POTUS & I made up. You had to be there.
Trying to send out the latest batch of "Sorry we cluster-bombed your home!" sympathy cards, but it's so hard to do a mail merge in Word 2007
Not sure if my PowerPoint should have the phrase "drone strike synergy" use the fly-in effect or not. Too obvious? Maybe just fade in?
Super stoked to share with you guys a behind-the-scenes look those White House kill list meetings! I'm the intern, and this job is the BOMB.
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