Luthor Tyrell
@LuthorTyrells
Idk, ask my wife.
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"I will microwave those mozzarella sticks tonight, my love."
"Shout out to @ModernOlenna for procreating with me. You're the best mother if mother's were solely judged on dragging their children."
Sends a cheese bouquet to my one and only, [@ModernOlenna], with a card signed "xoxo, your schmoospie".
"I should apologize for that one."
"All I remember from when you gave birth was how you threatened my life if I ever got you pregnant again. I was terrified."
"How am I supposed to remember them when they never come to visit me?"
"Wait. We had three kids? Where?!"
Pats the chub. "No regrets. Mozzarella sticks feel a lot like love."
"If by disappear you mean your grandmother took it away, yes."
Feeling confident. "That's what's up."
"Your father said he would come get me, but he must have gotten distracted by something shiny."
"I was a handsome, say it!"
"Your gram throws me a box of cereal every now and then, sometimes a loaf of bread."
Scratches head. "Um, well, I don't know? No one came to get me down!"
"I was trying to make the house look better than the Lannisters with my Christmas lights, but that bastard Tywin won yet again."
"That's beside the point. The fact is, you pursued me. And you chose me over a Targaryen, bye."
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