chief queef
@Mydad_pulledout
Absolutely awkward, proudest of nerd, decreaser of world sucking, aggressively infancy and stuff..
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Guess my taste for black Jews is never going to suffice #foreversingle @bigjayoakerson @ComicDaveSmith @luisjgomez @AriShaffir @rLegionOfSkanks
I left my jacket on the floor next to my crusty underwear
(+44): I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
My next pick-up line everyone....
(260): Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
So...I just watched the gauntlet episode of @rLegionOfSkanks and i couldn't help but lust over @ChristineMEvans and @bigjayoakerson and how casual it all was for them #CoupleGoals @ComicDaveSmith @luisjgomez
This is my art and it is not that deep
If I were to fully describe myself, Twitter would just cut me off and say "bitch you ain't even cool" #Facts
Facts
(585): I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Just the Droid I've been looking for
"Our aim is to change the stigma around adult toys by re-imagining them in a fun and nerdy way.” bit.ly/2AEkvu2 #StarWars #LastJedi #TheLastJedi #Australia #scifi
(503): They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Women are more complicated than horses, I get it!! But damn! not a single call back... #foreveralone
Long Island Man Arrested For Sex With Multiple Horses... gothamist.com/2017/10/26/hor…
I want someone to share and understand the joy of a good poop joke! that's all I want for Christmas!, FUCK YO DIAMONDS!!! I'M GOING FOR GOLD!! Y'all pH=14 basic!
Did you get my new book??? Get it now! tinyurl.com/y9mk6r8b Did you finish my new book! Review it on Amazon or wherever else you do such things! Thanks and good morning!
$1,500 or a car, I would probably take the money cuz there's no way I can afford the insurance payment on that shit! I'm Puerto Rican as fuck, My licence was revoked in the womb! I got child support motherfucker! @TheBonfireSXM #264 @bigjayoakerson @DanSoder #GOmite
Ohhhhh shit. - The @joerogan Experience #1048 with @DougStanhope #podpants pca.st/episode/8f6bd9…
I am going to bed, secure in the knowledge that I never did anything abusive or untoward in front of any... whaaaa??? Whooo? I hereby resign! Talk to my lawyer! Fake news!!!
If you’re a good person, you have nothing to worry about— so stop worrying.
United States Tendances
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