NotsoOrderly's profile picture. To sacrifice, but knowing to survive.
The first decline, another state of mind.
I'm on my knees, I'm praying for a sign. #DDM.

James Sullivan

@NotsoOrderly

To sacrifice, but knowing to survive. The first decline, another state of mind. I'm on my knees, I'm praying for a sign. #DDM.

Unsure as to why. Hopefully I will be able to see @ScaredCrazy today and sneak her back to give her the present.]


Today. I also like to see if @AberrantDoctor is on shift. I have begun to feel a huge sense of resentment for that guy. Although I am still


I turn and make my way out of the locker room and head upstairs to the main office to check the duty rota and see what duties I am assigned


[Sitting the teddy bear on the metal shelf, I can't help but smile when imagining giving it to @ScaredCrazy. Shutting the door to my locker


wrapping her slender arms around me in a tight, silent hug of thanks.]


at night. Attempting to drown out the inner voice telling me it's purely to witness the happiness on @ScaredCrazy's features again, before


it. I tell myself it's another form of therapy, something for her to form a healthy attachment to. To practice talking with and cuddle >>


bear. Kinda blue in colour, with horns and spots. Almost Kitty-ish. I instantly decide to buy it for @ScaredCrazy. I'm sure she will love


Difficult emotions and relieve stress. The look on @ScaredCrazy's face was thanks enough. She was thrilled. My gaze lands on a small stuffed


(and totally unorthodox) to buy a grown woman colouring items, but I learnt at college, art therapy can be a marvellous way to express >>


aloud. Something which I felt I must keep from @abberantDoctor. I hope he doesn't discover her colouring pencils and pad.It may seem foolish


myself (indulgently thinking myself as more of a Lion) I was undoubtedly pleased with both the name and the fact that she had spoken >>


caught unawares by my daydreaming of @ScaredCrazy. Although I was unsure to what her internal thought process was between a cat and >>


around me and had called me 'Kitty'. Remembering this instantly brings a smile to my face as I wheel into the kids section. My attention >>


for her. I was completely aware of this. Yet unprepared to take a step back. She had spoke the other day. Obviously gaining confidence >>


monotonous, mundane tasks of work and a relief from what must be a confine of Hell for @ScaredCrazy. I was beginning to develop feelings >>


was missing. Recently, @ScaredCrazy and I had been spending a portion of the day together, most days. It was more than just a break from the


Of @ScaredCrazy. The rota had me on scheduled days off and I was missing her company something terrible. Feeling like a part of me >>


[Busy. Elsewhere. With her. That's where my thoughts were. Even as I push a half empty cart around the grocery store, my thoughts are full


But in all honesty. I found her shyness and unobtrusive manner to be a balm to this world of craziness. Did that make me insane?


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