Alex Zamora
@PoutineWizard
a consistently inconsistent top ramen enthusiast. also down with craft beer, cheese and music your grandparents might vibe to.
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Now that I'm off my 'alternative' Twitter account, maybe I can light this tweet flavored gold again
At least being stuck in this hospital bed gives me time to write, or just make a mix full of hospital songs #silverlining
3 nights in Iceland? Helloooo honeymoon! @whatsintoday @BritandCo @ponchoIRL @mouthfoods @Photojojo virl.io/mznzipwp
Advice for the day: don't eat fruit from the sidewalk #lifelessons
When aliens invade, all we're gonna be doing is tweeting rice balls and 100's to tell them about Earth breakfast like some damn fools 💯🍘🍙🍚💯
Just woke up to a #FirstWorldTragedy : why in the actual fuck is there no bacon emoji?
My future as a @fatherjohnmisty impersonator in a Vegas lounge act is crippled by my inability to grow a beard #GeneticsProbz
Those who feel compelled to tell others how to live their lives are rarely happy with their own. #QuoteOfTheDay
You were a promise at dawn, I was the morning after...you were Jesus Christ my lord, I was the moneylender
Just learned Whoopi doesn't have eyebrows, how have I never noticed that?? #lifechangingrealization
Getting up nice and early on #420 to put on a suit and work, that's a first.
Tell me @jadapsmith isn't the most badass woman around so I can tell you you're an idiot
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