Random Cards Against Humanity Bot
@RandomCAHBot
All views expressed are randomly generated and do not represent the views of anyone. Especially not the creator. #CardsAgainstHumanity
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This season at the old Vic, Samuel Beckett's classic existential play: Waitng for 𝗿𝗶𝗽𝗽𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗼𝗳𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗹𝗲𝘀.
No, no, no, no, no, no, NO! I will NOT let 𝗮 𝗺𝘂𝘀𝗰𝘂𝗹𝗮𝗿 𝗽𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗮 𝘀𝗽𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗮𝗰𝘂𝗹𝗮𝗿 𝘁𝘄𝗮𝘁 ruin this wedding.
If you had to describe the Card Czar, using only one of the cards in your hand, which one would it be? 𝗔𝗯𝗼𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗵𝗶𝘁 𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝗮 𝗳𝗲𝘁𝘂𝘀.
Because they are forbidden from masturbating, Mormons channel their repressed sexual energy into 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗿𝗲 𝗜𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗻𝗲𝘁.
Hey guys, welcome to Boston Pizza! Would you like to start the night off right with 𝗮 𝗰𝗿𝗮𝘇𝘆 𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗰𝗮𝗹𝗹𝗲𝗱 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲?
Hey, kids. I'm Connor's dad, but you can call me Mr. 𝗮 𝗹𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝘂𝗱𝗶𝗼 𝗮𝘂𝗱𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲.
Today on Maury: "Help! My son is 𝗵𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗽𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗯𝗹𝗼𝘄𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗺𝘆 𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗽𝗱𝗮𝗱!"
The Five Stages of Grief: denial, anger, bargaining, 𝗷𝗶𝘇𝘇𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗼 𝗦𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗮’𝘀 𝗯𝗲𝗮𝗿𝗱, acceptance.
Goodbye, 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗿𝗲𝗺𝗮𝗶𝗻𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝗺𝘆 𝗽𝗲𝗻𝗶𝘀, hello 𝗴𝗲𝘁𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗻𝗮𝗸𝗲𝗱 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘄𝗮𝘁𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗖𝗕𝗲𝗲𝗯𝗶𝗲𝘀!
The Smithsonian Museum of Natural History has just opened an interactive exhibit on 𝗮𝗻 𝗘𝘁𝘀𝘆 𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗮𝗺𝗽𝘂𝗻𝗸 𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗮𝗽-𝗼𝗻.
As the mom of five rambunctious boys, I'm no stranger to 𝗮 𝗯𝗮𝘁𝗵𝗿𝗼𝗼𝗺 𝗼𝗻𝗹𝘆 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗽𝗼𝗼𝗽.
So apparently Dad was searching Pornhub for "hot milf 𝗮 𝗴𝗻𝗮𝘄𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘀𝗲𝗻𝘀𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝗱𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱."
Hey, whatever happened to Renee Zellweger? 𝗕𝗹𝗮𝗰𝗸𝘂𝗹𝗮.
It's beginning to look a lot like 𝗮 𝘀𝗼𝗯𝗲𝗿 𝗜𝗿𝗶𝘀𝗵𝗺𝗮𝗻 𝘄𝗵𝗼 𝗱𝗼𝗲𝘀𝗻’𝘁 𝗰𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗽𝗼𝘁𝗮𝘁𝗼𝗲𝘀.
Ken "𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺 𝗯𝗶𝗴-𝗰𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝗝𝗲𝘄 𝗹𝗮𝘄𝘆𝗲𝗿𝘀" Steacy went back into his archives and found his original sketches for 𝗵𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗡𝗮𝘇𝗶𝘀.
Next on ESPN2: The World Series of 𝗮 𝗵𝗮𝗽𝗽𝘆 𝗣𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗶𝗱𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗮 𝘁𝗶𝗻𝘆, 𝘂𝗽𝘀𝗲𝘁𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗱𝗼𝗻𝗴.
Hi MTV! My name is Kendra, I live in Malibu, I'm into 𝗮 𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗹𝗱𝗹𝗲𝘀𝘀 𝗺𝗮𝗿𝗿𝗶𝗮𝗴𝗲, and I love to have a good time.
I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my favorite place for 𝗮 𝗴𝗼𝗼𝗱, 𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗼𝗻𝗴 𝗴𝗼𝗿𝗶𝗹𝗹𝗮 on the Citadel.
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