Realtor Quips
@RealtorQuips
Crazy Realtor quips overheard as a receptionist for 22 Realtors. They all earn over $1+million a year.
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R#17 A contract addendum should be like my assistants's skirt. Long enough to cover the subject, but short enough to keep it interesting.
Realtor#18 “Let others praise ancient times; I am glad I was born in these.” ― Ovid
R#7 whoever told you to be yourself, could not have dispensed worse advice
Realtor#6 “A bottle of wine contains more philosophy than all the books in the world.” ― Louis Pasteur
Realtor#18 - Power lies in how you respond to what life puts in your path. It’s always a choice. Choose to keep your head
Realtor#9 The problem with networking for most people, they try to get before they give.
Realtor#4 - The strongest client relationships are bonded by drunken memories
R#14 Listing appointment - It almost seems like a shame to waste this shitty, run down duplex on a non-suicide
R#8 The fact Jonah Hill & John Goodman are movie stars tells you all you need to know regarding determination, focus & drive
R#9 Client lunch went south apparently somebody left the bag of idiots open
R#13 Lender says my "buyer" is so broke he could cash out his entire retirement savings using a CoinStar machine
Realtor#5 The "craft" beer trend is officially passé when I heard "hops in beer is the new oak in wine"
Realtor#11 I'm distraught. What kind of housekeeper throws out their employer's drugs?
Realtor#5 Only once have I been to Las Vegas and not been laid, the time I brought my wife.
Realtor#15 It's been quite a drunk night in Manhattan when you get pulled over by the NYC harbor patrol
Realtor#18 If you purchase the off brand @Costco @CrownRoyal no further confirmation needed.. You drink too much
Realtor#16 If I wanted to spend this much time waiting for clients to call me back, I'd start dating again
Realtor#7 If the cute guy walking up to the bar asks about happy hour specials he's the wrong guy and your probably at the wrong bar.
Realtor#9 Take one step backwards to take 7 steps forward. Allow yourself to be mentored by the best for 1 year even if you don't get paid.
Realtor#14 How easily a client is offended has a direct correlation to a low apartment sale price. Cheap buyer = easily offended
Realtor#1 Many of the very best moments in life are those that can never be broadcast on FB, Twitter nor shared
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