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One starts an action simply because one must do something. - T. S. Eliot
The moment somebody says to me, "This is very risky," is the moment it becomes attractive to me. - Kate Capshaw
I hope you live to be as old as your jokes. - Anonymous
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Hollywood is a place where people from Iowa mistake each other for movie stars. -Fred Allen
France is the only country where the money falls apart and you can't tear the toilet paper. -Billy Wilder
My wife converted me to religion. I never believed in hell until I married her. - Hal Roach
You want to make God laugh? Tell him your future plans. - Woody Allen
Before I started working here, I drank, smoked, and used bad language. Thanks to this job, I now have good reason. - Anonymous
A secretary must think like a man, act like a lady, look like a girl and work like a dog. - Anonymous
People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up. - Ogden Nash
Can you imagine a world without men? No crime and lots of happy fat women. - Marion Smith
Men like cars, women like clothes. Women only like cars because they take them to clothes. - Rita Rudner
I was the best man at the wedding. So why is she marrying him? - Jerry Seinfeld
Miami bumper sticker: My horn is broken-so watch for my finger. - Anonymous
Hollywood is a place where people from Iowa mistake each other for movie stars. - Fred Allen
My wife loves Europe, but to me it's a bad day at a theme park. - Jay Leno
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