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Darwin: "Thank goodness the Champions League play-offs are drawing attention away from my poor finishing."
Slot: "I've got an idea, Mo. Why don't you lead the counterattack when we win the ball?" [Distant panting] Slot: "M-Mo?"
"Go away. There ain't no holding midfielder transfer target and there never was."
Klopp: "What does the future hold for Liverpool FC? Let's just say we have a few ideas up our sleeve." "Like what?" Klopp: "Uh, I'd rather not get into that right now." "Why not?" Klopp: "Alright, we don't have any ideas without Thiago. We got nothing. Happy?"
Klopp: "I wouldn't want to be playing Napoli. I mean, again."
"We'd like to dedicate this next contract extension to a very special footballer. He's a hundred years old, and has played many games for Liverpool." "This enormous gammon head will outlive us all."
"Now, here's a little trick to help you remember Liverpool's next two games. If they're Spanish and yella', you've got Villarreal there, fella. If they play in white and black, you got Newcastle, Jack."
Owen: "You guys must be getting pretty tired of hammering Manchester United by now.” Klopp: “No-one who supports Liverpool would say that.”
Klopp: "I for one would like to see Sheffield United's team news in advance, so I can adjust my own accordingly. I don't like the idea of Ben Davies starting three consecutive games in one week."
Klopp: "That Fulham side grifted you good, Julian." Ward: "Well, there's no shame in being beaten by the best." Klopp: "But they didn't seem all that..." Ward: "We were beaten by the best, Jürgen."
"Dateline: Liverpool. The elusive Red Baron continued to thumb his nose at authorities. Swaggering about in a garish new cap, he seemed to say: 'Look at me, EFL! I have a new cap!’"
Milner: "You've got to help us, Jürgen. We've created nothing, and we're all out of ideas."
"Klopp! I knew it was him! Even when it was Leeds requesting the match be suspended, I knew it was him!"
Salah: "So, Mr. Gerrard, it seems that Penaltypool has been resumed by the very person who started them."
Solskjaer: "Huh. I'll be back at United in 24 weeks." Klopp: "We'll try to make it 12."
Klopp: “Hello. Liverpool FC open for transfer business. Who are you to resist us, eh? Come on, my last signing was Konaté. My squad needs Bergwijn.”
Little Shaq
UEFA: “And what are your reasons for wanting to beat Atlético?” Klopp’s brain: “Don’t say revenge, don’t say revenge.” Klopp: “Uh... revenge?” Klopp’s brain: “That’s it. I’m getting out of here.”
Solskjaer: “Go Sancho.” Guardiola: “Go Grealish.“ Klopp: “Go Origi.”
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