Star Wars Scripts
@StarWarsScripts
In addition to Eps. 7-9, rumors abound that any number of Star Wars spinoffs will be made featuring ancillary SW characters. Here are plots we'd like to see...
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In which recent frat pledge Han Solo undergoes “the Kessel Run” and can’t sit down for days.
“Do or do not. There is no try.” In which Yoda reminds Luke to take a stand for what’s right, even if it means losing a few subscribers. In the dark cave, you will only encounter what you take in with you.
“It was as if millions of voices cried out in terror and hit ‘unsubscribe from podcast’ all at once”
In which Yoda repeatedly smacks some whiney close-minded brats with his gimer stick because they have lost their way in understanding the true meaning of The Force
In which #KellyMarieTran as Rose Tico spends two hours kicking toxic Vader fanboys in their “asteroids”
Uncle Owen, fearing that droids will replace him as labor and sick of those Tusken Raiders letting their banthas graze on HIS land, not to mention wacky old wizards spouting hippie spiritualism to his impressionable nephew, runs for office on a Make Tatooine Great Again platform
General Hux reminisces on a Life Day long ago when he tortured two would-be thieves with a series of booby traps
Yoda and Crix Madine, recently returned from following the Grateful Dead on tour in a van, enjoy some good Jedi Tree smoke and discuss, like, the whole galaxy, man...
Star Wars Episode XII: The Made-For-TV Reunion Movie
In which the origin of Han Solo's surname is revealed to be a nickname from his frat house days
Dex's Diner becomes the epicenter of an epic Tarantino-esque showdown. And somehow, it still sucks...
In which we discover that the real Phantom Menace was space herpes all along...
In which R2D2 experiences a torrid love triangle with a Hoover and a Dyson...which will he choose?!
C3PO gets caught up in a sexting scandal, having been exposed as the infamous pseudonym "Goldenrod"
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