Alicia Erin
@Starvingbones
I want to weigh 50 kilograms. 20 | Artist | Fat | Trying to be perfect.
Maybe if I'm a handful of kilograms lighter, he'll be impressed. Maybe if I'm thin, he'll be proud.
Even for the man who wants to marry me, I will never be good enough. I will never be pretty enough or thin enough or talented enough.
I didn't want to care. I didn't want to return to this. But I feel forced. I will never be good enough.
First things first. Gotta make a plan. Gotta make a schedule. Gotta fast.
I've been bad for several months now. Eating on and off. I've reassessed my values. This is important. I'm giving up animals for veganism.
Also. I'm picking out colours for this website. I really hope England goes through. Really hope England goes through.
I have this app for My droid that keeps track of everything I eat and how much I burn. Problem is that it won't lemme set a UGW under 94lbs.
No calorie tea, packing and the boyfriend's out. I'm gonna turn the music up in hopes that England goes through. #excited
Secretly, I'm happy I have food poisoning. Gives me an excuse to not eat. C:
Those moments where you truly honestly believe you can trust someone then realize that they're lying to you and have been this whole time.
But the time before that i gave up for nearly two weeks before I cracked down again.
Last time I binged like fuck, then ate a bit the next day to keep my body revved. Took Laxatives. Got right back on track.
Tomorrow is always the day I screw up. Always Tuesdays. Always the end of the third day. Tomorrow will not be like that.
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