Ted_Orphan's profile picture. Local treasure and co-producer @itsgoodcomedy

cowabunga lifestyle coach

@Ted_Orphan

Local treasure and co-producer @itsgoodcomedy

Damn where they find five foot stilts?

Did you know — Vin Diesel voiced the infamous “I am Groot” for potentially over $10 million, per MCU film. He Voiced the line in multiple languages. He reportedly got paid $54 million total, though James Gunn denied it. Diesel even wore stilts to feel like a 7.5 foot tree.



Are these going to be normal sized and shaped ties? Trump needs new ties for sure.

Ted_Orphan's tweet image. Are these going to be normal sized and shaped ties? Trump needs new ties for sure.

Since it seems like everyone is just now watching the OxiContin shows.

Of the two OxyContin shows, Dopesick (Hulu) is much better than Painkiller (Netflix), but I think the best received version would be a televised slow torture and eventual murder of the Sacklers.



On the streetcar to work and a horse girl is speaking her best broken Spanish to a lady who complimented her Labubu in broken English. If that’s not the country you want to live in I don’t know what to tell you.


Not to be a jerk, but does the motorcycle gang in Task even like riding motorcycles?


New Orleans: “911 might not work today”

Ted_Orphan's tweet image. New Orleans:  “911 might not work today”

I don’t think that it’s crazy to say, all of this is Jay Leno’s fault.


Now hear me out... What if we, New Orleans, just don't respond or sign up for Delta Utilities.


W’s was better and we were “under attack” as a country.

No pressure, just the first tee shot ever on your new golf course with the world press watching. President Trump drives it over 290 yards down the middle of the fairway.



Same at is ever was.

The fact that The Black Eyed Peas had Where is The Love and Let’s Get Retarded on the same hit album says a lot more about the early 2000s than any of us are ready to admit.



If they were to cut to someone from Orleans Parish during the Let Louisiana Shine anti-littering commercial.


Small city thing about New Orleans is you’ll be flying back there and see someone else getting on the plane and be like oh I know him from “around”


Santa?

Allen Iverson blew through over $200M in NBA money... But was saved financially by a secret clause. Here's the wild story:

AndrewPetcash's tweet image. Allen Iverson blew through over $200M in NBA money...  

But was saved financially by a secret clause.  

Here's the wild story:


Da jeep wasn’t maybe gonna espload outta nowhere.

Another Trump lie…he said secret service wouldn’t let him drive the Tesla at the White House….weird they let Biden drive a Jeep



This is still a good one.

If I delete Facebook how else will I be reminded of how fucking annoying I used to be.



Help. My job is finding out I’m not nearly as dumb as I’ve been pretending to be.


New Orleans please watch out for falling icicles, but also this is probably your only day ever to blame almost shooting your eye out with a BB gun on them.


Bye Tik Tok.


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