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Sometimes it snows in April Sometimes I feel so bad Sometimes I wish that life was never ending, But all good things, they say, never last.
Our crews are currently dealing with a fire on the allotments on Campbell Road, Stoke. Please avoid the area.
A river of boiling shit flows through your town. You haven’t seen a tomato for 18 months. MOTD is 3 minutes long and narrated by a parakeet. Your salary is paid directly to British Gas. You solve a riddle to speak to a GP. You feel people come here because they want an easy life
Should I step down as head of Twitter? I will abide by the results of this poll.
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It’s an important point that Truss & Kwarteng have no mandate from the British people for the hugely destructive actions they are taking. It’s worth registering this through the current surging petition—> petition.parliament.uk/petitions/6197…
When I swept to power in 1995 I made no secret of my devotion to naked wrestling. An online video has gone viral of me in 1989 going 3 rounds with Albert the Giant, unclothed. Let me be clear. We all have hobbies. Some go bird-watching. I fight nude people. Can we grow up please?
Result... the bogs on Euston station are free to use! Not sure when they stopped charging passengers but my early afternoon poo will be even more satisfying now. #freedump
Ok hear me out: ✈️ All 11 of them are put on a plane to Rwanda 💰Each are given a budget and personal responsibility 🤹♀️Every time they cross a boarder they have to prove they’re a high skilled worker 🚪 First one back to No. 10 wins
Again, bc it seems appropriate here.... If "are you fu*king kidding me?" Was a person
I just signed the petition calling for the government to drop plans to electronically tag innocent people for attending protests. Will you join me? you.38degrees.org.uk/petitions/don-… via @38_degrees
you.38degrees.org.uk
Don't electronically tag innocent people for attending protests
The Government’s new Public Order Bill would allow police to put innocent people on electronic ankle tags and ban them from attending marches and demonstrations. Campaigners and people who want...
I just signed the petition calling on Culture Secretary @NadineDorries to scrap her damaging plans to sell off Channel 4! Can you add your name too? #SaveChannel4 speakout.38degrees.org.uk/campaigns/keep…
These Betting Ads that encourage people to “bet responsibly.” If hookers carried a similar warning…
🚨BREAKING🚨 🔴⚪️#SCFC have confirmed that 39-year-old Phil Jagielka has joined the club from Derby until the end of the season.
Pretty weird country where the most embarrassing prime minister of the last decade isn't the one that fucked a dead pig.
Starting to think the government sees governing as a side job to their main occupation of doing crime goodlawproject.org/update/high-co…
Nice place you’ve got here. I hate what you’ve done with it.
When national football teams do well in international competitions, birth rates drop nine months later. The authors, Dr. Luca Fumarco and Dr. Francesco Principe, speculate "these results might be explained by individuals’ time allocation choices."
Matt Hancock - It Was Me (Shaggy Parody). Written / Performed by myself. Edits by @CarlossRicoo. #healthsecretary #matthancock #boris
This probably is “world beating”
Boris Johnson just thanked the people of Hartlepool by telling them as many barefaced lies as he could cram into 30 seconds! Watch in disbelief
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