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I cut a hole in my underwear so my asshole hair hangs out like a horse's tail.
I stretch my foreskin over my dick head and it looks like I'm shining up a bowling ball when I'm masturbating.
So did Chewbacca have like a regular dick? Or was it like a dog's little weird red lipstick thing?
Fingered a fat girl for the first time in my life. It felt like a duck nibbling crumbs out of my hand. Did I do that right?
I move my fingers the same way a person plays the clarinet while I masturbate.
Just wiped from left to right. Now my ass cheeks look like they have eye brows.
Took a DNA test and found out that I'm 1% black. Seriously considering growing out a assfro.
Beating my uncle in a thumb wrestling match is probably the highlight of my life. Granted, it was under the covers. But a win's a win in my book.
I'm going to grow out one single pubic hair, so i can call my dick Indiana Jones.
Looks like a pool pawty!! I yelled at my girlfriend, and her ugly family swimming.
Homeless people don't have it that bad. I just seen one building a sick ass cardboard fort.
I look like a small Yorkie licking the inside of a white woman's mouth when I eat pussy.
I've wiped so many times today, my asshole looks like Donald Duck's chapped lips.
A back scratcher, but it's what I use to keep my balls from dipping in the toilet water.
Obi-Wan's robe in Star Wars was actually glued together foreskin.
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