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Dear TSA, Did you guys bump your head on a rock or something? #tsa
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This lady on the treadmill next to me is wearing much perfume I'm gonna hurl Should I puke on her?
She reached in, grabbed a box of Kleenex, and chucked it at me. "You are both nuts!" she cried. "We're outa here! Let's go Shekie, get in!"
"Hey, that almost hit me!" She go after Shekie, but he too fast. I hollered at her. "I need medical attention! I's bleeding! Come heal me!"
She was just about to go off on me when a rusty old crushed Tecate can whiz past her ear, fluff her hair, and nail me right in the forehead.
Kalie looked at me in amazement as if I had just done something terrible. "What?" I begs! "Hey, you like my new M2120s? $530 at Zappos.com!"
I kicked it so hard, Kalie and I watched it land 100' away and roll into the cement base of a light pole. Hang-time was about seven seconds.
In a flash, I dove on the floor of the Towncar and thrust my right Marc Jacobs M2120 patent high-top sneaker toward an unsuspecting Shekie!
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