Dan
@captain_test
My bio can be longer than any tweet I might care to send
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I just entered @AutoTrader_UK’s monthly️ #ElectricCarGiveaway & you can too! This month’s prize is a Ford Mustang Mach-E GT worth over £69k! It’s free to enter & you have until 30th June. All information (including Ts&Cs) can be found here: bit.ly/3xDYOHy
if the rent is too high just live in a strawberry
My response to the (weird) greeting 'Happy New Year': 'Thank you but I pay absolutely no attention to the 'New Year', an empty moment which I associate with the former USSR's (failed) attempt to abolish Christmas'
A Soup and a Sandwich, what’s better than that! 💕🥪🍲💕
Get a cat wheel so your cat will exercise they said
The Onion 10 years ago, and AP today Ten. Fucking. Years.
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