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My definition of a girl that's my friend with benefits is one who makes diner and then does all of my dishes for me 😂😂👌👌
NEVER underestimate a woman's ability to make you feel guilty for her mistake.
Fifty shades of grey is romantic only because the guy is a billionaire. If he was living in a trailer it would be a Criminal minds episode.
I don't pretend to be something I'm not. I know I'm an asshole, and I own that shit like a motherfucker.
The awkward moment when your mom asks you if she can be your dd 😳😳😂😂😂
Everyone is going out for Valentine's Day and I'm over here like I'll take another bottle of Jack Daniels please. 🍹🍹🍺🍺👌👌
Happy "Alentines Ay" for those who won't be getting the "v" or the "d" on February 14th 😂😂😂😂
“@KinkySexTweets: The best girls are always gonna be the most difficult, so deal with it or get yourself a basic hoe”
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