dearblankplease's profile picture. Reasonable requests to an unreasonable world.

Dear Blank

@dearblankplease

Reasonable requests to an unreasonable world.

Dear Cosmo, Please provide more realistic ways to spice up my sex life. Licking my boyfriend's eyelids isn't hot, … dearblankpleaseblank.com/permalink.php?…


Dear girl who cheats off me in math class, You do realize I've been feeding you the wrong answers all semester, rig… dearblankpleaseblank.com/permalink.php?…


Dear fan, I realize I shouldn't jump on my bed, but seriously, violence is not the answer! Sincerely, that hurt! dearblankpleaseblank.com/permalink.php?…


Dear MTV, I find it ironic that you're trying to prevent teen pregnancy, but you have shows about drugs, alcohol an… dearblankpleaseblank.com/permalink.php?…


Dear Asian couple buying sushi and tea with a Hello Kitty debit card, Please, be more stereotypical. Sincerely, you… dearblankpleaseblank.com/permalink.php?…


Dear nerd in my science class, I get that you wanna learn, but when someone has a lazer pointer and is pointing it … dearblankpleaseblank.com/permalink.php?…


Dear Waldo, On a scale of Anne Frank to Osama Bin Laden, how good was my hiding spot? Sincerely, Saddam Hussein dearblankpleaseblank.com/permalink.php?…


Dear kid in my class named Marco, Attendance has always been fun. Sincerely, POLO! dearblankpleaseblank.com/permalink.php?…


Dear parents, When I jokingly asked "was I planned?" and you answered with "We knew the risks." I died a little ins… dearblankpleaseblank.com/permalink.php?…


Dear Obama, "We killed him and threw him in the ocean." Really? Sincerely, pics or GTFO. dearblankpleaseblank.com/permalink.php?…


Dear light switch, Why must you be so close to the garbage disposal switch? Sincerely, scared the crap out of mysel… dearblankpleaseblank.com/permalink.php?…


Dear Eve, Stand back, I don't know how big this thing gets. Sincerely, Adam dearblankpleaseblank.com/permalink.php?…


Dear dignity, Please forgive me when she starts to dance on the table. Sincerely, tequila. dearblankpleaseblank.com/permalink.php?…


Dear best friend, When I die, immediately clear my web history. Sincerely, seriously, it's important. dearblankpleaseblank.com/permalink.php?…


Dear world, My goal is to survive five apocalypses. Sincerely, three down... dearblankpleaseblank.com/permalink.php?…


Dear Mr. 4.75 shots of espresso, 3.5 pumps of hazelnut and 2.75 pumps of vanilla, half non-fat and half whole milk,… dearblankpleaseblank.com/permalink.php?…


Dear Ben, For the last time, marijuana is not a flavor. Sincerely, Jerry dearblankpleaseblank.com/permalink.php?…


Dear Wizard of Oz, The scarecrow had no brains, tin man had no heart, lion was a coward, and the wizard was a liar.… dearblankpleaseblank.com/permalink.php?…


Dear daughter, It's ok to tell me the truth, after all, I did pay for that birth control. Sincerely, I'm not THAT s… dearblankpleaseblank.com/permalink.php?…


Dear little brother, Yes, I will pretend to be a unicorn for your game of Harry Potter. No, I will not be named Mr.… dearblankpleaseblank.com/permalink.php?…


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