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“There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die.” -H S Thompson
I clog my pores like I’m filling in a scantron
Just picked some orange and pink roses............do you grow them...........have you ever rubbed a wet rose on your face?
Not interested in any of the stress associated with the aftermath of murdering someone. Getting a new phone and camping? Not for me.
Me: *trying to flush the toilet at a friend's house* Unflushable poop:
I should have been cast as Yoshi, given how many eggs I’ve shot out of my ass
Extremely disappointed by the Taliban here
BREAKING: The Taliban announce a list of deputy ministers, failing to appoint any women, doubling down on an all-male, all-Taliban government in Afghanistan. apne.ws/usSETrS
cursed still image from an early 90s taco bell commercial where a woman eats the taco FROM THE TOP
Me: This pizza is really good! Somebody Who Visited Italy With Their Family For A Week When They Were 14: *sighs* It’s fine...
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