༊*·˚ghost ༉
@ghosttcals
୨⎯ ♡︎ mainly shedtwt, sometimes drugtwt, just the digital diary of a princess with a drinking problem ♡︎ ⎯୧
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now that my meds are gone i can feel the crazy coming back, like i feel so weird and depressed and miserable. so anyways starting off with 950 cals today
they hate it when u serve desperate need for control in every way and being bossy and mean mommy issues and not calling girls mommy and wanted to be told what to do mommy issues
today my psych said my weight when i deliberately wasnt looking, then she literally said the wrong intake for me acting like i ate more than i did and she totally like degraded my ed and yes i played it down bc my dad was there but still
at my lw i weighed less than this rlly skinny girl at my school fml
i found so many rare pulls going through my old tweets (name covered bc im gonna show my friend)
i have zero recollection of this wtf?? when did i ever?? and what med?? im so lost
just got referred to an ed therapist + prescribed a med that sounds like a mario character name ♡︎
wdym this used to be me AND i thought i was disgustingly fat… pls come back im now bmi 24 (at least im a 32DD?)
i wish twt would let me see my oldest tweets i can barely remember being 13/14 anymore
ive accepted that being a full time college student, having a job, & having to provide nearly full time care for a kindergartner while dealing with a sleep disorder and adhd (untreated) doesnt let me live like i did at 14, but trust when i get treatment and live alone ill be back
i miss how it felt being deep in my ed like how everything blurred together and it felt like a fever dream. i miss the freezing walks and how everything was kind of gray and calm, i miss the little rush when i had to give a shitty excuse to my parents, i miss feeling small
my best friend is in a friend group w people that dont fw me its so humiliating like wdym u have a fuckin name word like in ginny and georgia and a shared tt and active gc and hangout every day thats all i want in life im gonna kms
i had the craziest worst dream ever and i just have to go back to living my life????
i miss summer i got to be my true freak self and i was actually getting some now i have two second long vanilla freak time every two months bc of my gfs job and she bails on me for that job on our four year anniversary
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