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Please something else go wrong today. Mercury can get out of reverse cowgirl at any time, thanks.
The post office can go suck a dick. Squishing my real mail to shove in my ads.
I don’t care what anyone says, there’s a special circle of hell reserved for people who show up on the dot of when a business opens. I hate all of you equally.
✌🏼✌🏼✌🏼✌🏼✌🏼
Madeleine Albright, who dedicated her life to the genocide of #Serbs, has died on the eve of the anniversary of NATO's bombing of #Yugoslavia. Thousands of civilians were killed by her bombs, including women and children. May God show her the mercy that she never showed us.
KING
Pre-workout: I would rather kill myself than exercise right now Post-workout: exercise is the only thing keeping me from killing myself
watching schitt’s creek isn’t enough. i need to be one of moira’s wigs.
Hot take: Pushing for electric cars only serves to further the narrative of personal responsibility for climate change. Most of the components in electric cars can not be recycled or repurposed. Trains or bust
I’m like that weird old man whose like “you’ve never listened to Led Zeppelin?!You’ve never seen the god father??” except it’s indie music from the mid-aughts
Happy new year to my friends. And a bad new year to my enemies. And a medium new year to people who are probably nice but walk too slowly
Bitches be like yeah I’m spiritual then describe psychosis
I did NOT just see pheobe bridgers fans discovering bright eyes on tik tok, I feel elderly
I’m in such a miserable mood, i better buy something that’ll help 😌
literally no reason to trust cdc over astrology at this point
The irony of ADHD is that you can’t do anything because you want to do everything.
One shot and I’m replying to everyone’s ig story why am I this way
Me as a therapist: ok so what’s your sign?
Weren’t we all, Duncan Hines. Weren’t we all.
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