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Learned a new term today “ Functioning Alcoholic” Yup that’s me!!!
One thing straight and 2 things gay…. Tequila will always be on the menu
This whole working and having responsibilities is overrated, take it back….
Keep his stomach full, his balls empty, your ex blocked, and your throat unlocked
Marry me please
Everyone trying to be on a boat this summer…. Fuck the boat I wanna be on a plane ✈️ or a damn island this summer!
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