mybrokenpicker
@mybrokenpicker
Blogging away while figuring out what I want to be when I grow up. I am making lots of mistakes in the process and need to tell everyone all about them.
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Online Dating Try #503 mybrokenpicker.com/2022/03/31/onl…
mybrokenpicker.com
Online Dating Try #503
I’ve done it, I’ve swiped to the end of Bumble again. And Hinge. I haven’t downloaded Tinder this time around because I don’t think I have the fortitude for it. And let̵…
I am not a romantic but… mybrokenpicker.com/2021/07/21/i-a…
mybrokenpicker.com
I am not a romantic but…
The other night I observed the most awkward marriage proposal. I never realized that being party to something like that could feel so uncomfortable. First of all it was at a very busy restaurant at…
Bringing Sexy Back – Sleep Apnea Edition mybrokenpicker.com/2020/10/12/bri…
mybrokenpicker.com
Bringing Sexy Back – Sleep Apnea Edition
I have decided I am never going to date again. Not because quarantine has made me into even more of a misanthrope than I already was or because people are gross and don’t wash their hands at …
2020 is that roller coaster ride that lasts forever. If only I had been too short to ride it. #2020worstyear #2020istheworst #makeitstop #2020isarollercoaster #adultingishard
Out of respect for the lives of friends and family lost on 9/11, we post this today. Please RT. #covidisreal #notahoax #Covid_19 #covid19 #trumpknew #truthmatters #sciencematters #scienceisreal #wedeservebetter #weareunsubscribe
The best time of day is when my phone goes into Do Not Disturb mode. #leavemealone #dontcallme #funnyquotes #donotdisturb
Stop crying about your problems on the internet. Bottle them up inside and disguise them with dark inappropriate humor, like a grown-up. #sarcasm #mybrokenpicker #adulting #overit
Sorry honey, sarcasm falls out of my mouth just like stupid falls out of yours. #mybrokenpicker #stupidisasstupiddoes #relatablequotes #sarcasm #sarcastic #sarcasm #sarcasticquotes
Note to self - Your mask doesn’t cover your eyes. People can see you when you give them a dirty look. Not the same as wearing sunglasses. #notetoself #dirtylooks #whenyouwearamask #notsunglasses #mybrokenpicker #oops #peopleofwalmart #itwastarget #peopleoftarget #rbf #stinkeye
Of all the things I’ve lost, I miss my metabolism the most. #mybrokenpicker #fastmetabolism #thingofthepast #gettingoldersucks #quoteoftheday #qotd #seattle
At least we don’t have to hunt for our own food. I don’t even know what the taco’s natural habitat is. #ilovetacos #silverlining #brightside #adulting #mybrokenpicker
Adulthood has shown me that you don’t need fun to have alcohol. #adulthood #mybrokenpicker #adultingishard #thesteuggleisreal #quoteoftheday #funnyquotes
I’m not saying I hate you, what I’m saying is that you are literally the Monday of my life. #mood #mondaymood #acaseofthemondays #youaremymonday #adulting #adultingishard #mybrokenpicker #relatable #relatablequotes #sarcasm #sarcasticquotes #thestruggleisreal
I’m 97% sure you don’t like me, but I’m 100% sure I don’t care. #adulting #sarcasm #sarcasticquotes #relatable #mybrokenpicker #dontcare #quoteoftheday #qotd
I am not responsible for what my face does when you talk. #pleasedont #mybrokenpicker #adulting #adultingishard #peoplesuck #sarcasm #sarcasticquotes #relatable #quoteoftheday
If you have an opinion about my life, please raise your hand. Now put it over your mouth. #adulting #adultingishard #relatable #relatablequotes #mybrokenpicker #opinionsarelikeassholes #everyonehasone #thestruggleisreal #sarcasm #sarcasticquotes #overit
When people see you lying down with your eyes closed, they still ask “Are You Sleeping?” “No, I’m training to die. #mybrokenpicker #sotired #adultingishard #trainingsleep #peoplearedumb #thestruggleisreal #relatable #relatablequotes #sarcasm #sarcasticquotes
My brain is like the Bermuda Triangle. Information goes in and is never found again. #mybrokenpicker #adulting #adultingsucks #adultingishard #gettingold #thestruggleisreal #cantremember
They call it a “selfie” because “narcissistic” is too hard to spell. #selfie #sarcasm #quoteoftheday #sarcasticquotes #relatable #relatablequotes #mybrokenpicker #toooldtounderstand
I’m not insulting you. I’m describing you. I thought I was pretty spot on. #mybrokenpicker #adulting #adultingishard #thetruthhurts #relatable #quoteoftheday #sundayfunday #relatablequotes #sarcasm #sarcasticquotes
United States Trends
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