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Babe, we've been dating for 6 months maybe you could put my last name in your phone instead of the name of the bar we met at
The law and order president will simply not stop committing crimes
When ur printer won’t work no matter how hard u try but flawlessly cranks out a crisp ink levels page u should be allowed to murder ur neighbor who plays the loud thumpy music all day
“The losing presidential candidate’s motorcade drives through a crowd of crazed supporters protesting on his behalf, en route to play golf” would be a perfect cold open to the movie about 2020 America
If you are ever more than 2 of these 3 things at any given time, you’re doing the wrong crimes
According to Trump's inner circle, he is depressed, out of money, and afraid of going to jail.
You can tell how depressed someone is by how early they put up their Christmas tree. Desperate for a jolt of serotonin, no matter how fleeting it may be. Mine’s been up since 2013
They should test out an electoral college type system with other stuff. 4 out of 5 dentists agree this toothpaste is good but they all live in the same state so chew on this glass bitch
In the United States of America, people are protesting “vote counting.”
Soooo the president of the united states has five (5) tweets flagged for violating the site’s content policies in the last 24 hours and no one bats an eye but i say the word ass on club penguin one time and i get banned????
To recap: The president wants the rest of the votes counted in Arizona, because he's losing, but says he's "won" Pennsylvania and Michigan, where there are hundreds of thousands of votes still outstanding. The American public must understand that the president is lying to them.
the president is an objectively bad human being and 4 more years of him will change the world in ways we will never be able to recover from but the rapper I liked in high school just endorsed him soooo 🤔🤔🤔
Biden- "If you make over 400k a year your taxes will be higher." Guys from my high school that make 35K a year-
This election is a tough call because one candidate was endorsed by both the Taliban and the KKK and the other was endorsed by a broad bipartisan coalition and the New England Journal of Medicine.
I’m just glad that in a time where we all exist in echo chambers, consistently having our existing beliefs reinforced, we were able to hear directly from the presidential candididates on separate networks, airing at the exact same time
A key thing I don’t think people fully appreciate about Trump is he’s completely incapable of engaging with policy beyond soundbites. His mind can’t grasp details or nuance, so when he’s asked about them he immediately changes the topic. This clip shows it
is it bad that I keep having to rewind The Social Dilemma because I got distracted by my phone
United States Trends
- 1. Belichick N/A
- 2. Bill Polian N/A
- 3. Hall of Fame N/A
- 4. Brady N/A
- 5. #TheMaskedSinger N/A
- 6. HOFer N/A
- 7. Nebraska N/A
- 8. Spygate N/A
- 9. Palat N/A
- 10. #DelcyPorLaPaz N/A
- 11. NFL HOF N/A
- 12. #DelcyConMiguelCabrera N/A
- 13. The HOF N/A
- 14. Tillis N/A
- 15. Rutgers N/A
- 16. Kraft N/A
- 17. #ShootingStar N/A
- 18. Webb N/A
- 19. Jamarques Lawrence N/A
- 20. Mast N/A
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