ozymandias's penis
@returnofthebean
two vast and trunkless legs of stone stand in the desert.... near them, on the sand, one vast trunk
You might like
"My coworker was super cordial until I kind of sort of tried to murder them" is genuinely a very funny thing to complain about
Tucker Carlson: "What's [AOC] like?" Matt Gaetz: "Before Jan. 6 she was incredibly chummy with Republicans, she would regularly come over to our side, sit down, hang out... after Jan. 6 she treated us all like we had horns or something."
it’s called boxing day because you’re supposed to spend it eating box
My oldest was like 2 when my wife's dad was in the hospice dying. We had bought him a stuffed monkey that was labelled Funky Monkey, so he called it that. Except "funky" sounded just like "fucking" so when he was playing with it he'd say "where's the fucking monkey?" "I love my…
me: [throwing open blinds] you there! boy! what day is it today? street urchin: why, it’s Christmas Day sir! me: oh, wonderful! that means it’s not too late for BOFA street urchin: what’s- shopkeeper: listen, kid. he does this every day
Rudolph is one of the only examples of bioluminescence in mammals. One of the only other ones was that time we made our weakest cousin swallow a keychain flashlight. Weakest cousin is determined annually by a series of trials
merry christmas i’m still confused about this
Christmas dinner 2065 when you’re not woke anymore
She won me back 110% with just this so fucking funny
"can a man be brave if he is afraid?" "that is the only time he can be brave."
some would have us believe this app doesn't have juice anymore
We Wish You Baby, A Merry It's Cold Christmas Outside 🤝 not going until you get some
[building a fun snowman] guy from winter wonderland: we should pretend he’s ordained to speak for god
one of my favorite christmas gifts to my dad ever. i don't think anything in the world made him laugh so hard
for christmas i'm surprising my dad with a calendar full of swimsuit babes unhappily posing with carps
United States Trends
- 1. Brook Lopez 2,420 posts
- 2. Keyonte George 2,311 posts
- 3. #SmackDown 26.2K posts
- 4. Pistons 4,673 posts
- 5. Kawhi 4,335 posts
- 6. Kwanzaa 56.2K posts
- 7. UTSA 4,110 posts
- 8. Blazers 3,338 posts
- 9. Ausar N/A
- 10. Melo 12.6K posts
- 11. Levert N/A
- 12. Nick Shirley 158K posts
- 13. Embiid 4,979 posts
- 14. Jazz 26.7K posts
- 15. Ivey 1,466 posts
- 16. Cade 22.2K posts
- 17. Jordan Poole N/A
- 18. FDNY 14.3K posts
- 19. #Ashes 21K posts
- 20. John Collins N/A
Something went wrong.
Something went wrong.