Shelby Says
@shellafunny
quotes from the best Vegan Mormon you'll ever meet
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I can tell I’m going to have a rough period by the noises my stomach is making. It’s like I can hear my uterus shedding.
Was reading a horoscope that really related to me and then I realized it was actually the description of a mental illness
"I just really want to be be rich. It's really important to me..." -@shellafunny
Unknown number calling Me: Shelby, answer it! Shel: I don't want to. What if it's the lady calling to see if I did my #visitingteaching?!
"It turns out money does make you happier if you spend it on things like services so maybe I'll just get a nanny." For who? "Me."
You don't want to be going through your Instagram feed and then all of the sudden see a 'gina.
Shelb: I am DTF Me: Uhhh Shelb: Dedicated To Fun...well I'm DTF too, but only my husband
"You know that pine tree I park in front of at work? Well lately I've just had this urge to like...cuddle with it."
That's the thing about British people...most of them look like their dogs.
I've been thinking about and I usually try to limit myself to one banana a day, but I think I'm going to have two. #rebel 🍌
I am thankful everyday that I've never had a job with a uniform.
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