nobody likes you elon
@skittlevoid
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I went to the Apple Store to buy new headphones n realized I forgot my credit card in my other purse and I asked the clerk if they took Apple Pay n he looked at me and said what do u think
In retrospect it’s wild that anyone acted like that submarine didn’t immediately and violently collapse
I barely seeing any margaritas on the timeline today… the economy is for sure cooked.
On my last work trip i guessed everyones sun sign correctly and when they asked how i knew i could only answer , “vibes” I’ve peaked
so jealous of cats to be honest. imagine being a huge bitch literally all the time and the person who takes care of you is like awwwwwww
I really just can’t understand how this is our reality…. AGAIN. There tens of millions of eligible candidates for presidency & the best we can find is two white men pushing 80 to run the supposed greatest country in the world??? I’m sorry, it’s pathetic
Joe Biden and Donald Trump have officially secured enough delegates to become the Democratic and Republican nominees for President, cementing a rematch between the two in November.
being in a Work Hotel you did not pay for is one of life's greatest joys. roll around in the sheets. take a shower. watch shark tank. every second you're there feels like you're stealing
my friend is at a fancy wedding in NYC and I absolutely lost my mind at this shrimp luge. so unsettling
Rich people love to venmo request you $4.72 for like half a bagel because they have no concept of money and don’t understand that working class people operate under an economy of buying someone a beer. I currently owe around 23 beers to friends and am owed around 29 beers
one thing about January is that she's going to make sure you feel all 31 of her days
okay it's been long enough can we put the headphone jacks back in
Asking for a sick day feels so infantalizing, composing a professional email to be like “I frew up”
There should be a rule against Tiktokers or content creators not being allowed to use the gym
Solidarity with the hundreds of thousands of people nationwide who marched in support of a #CeasefireNOW. Our pro-peace, pro-humanity movement is strong and it is growing daily.
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