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It may take me 48-52 hours for sloths to have intercourse, but I'll be sliding in yo DMs faster than basic girls eat Chipotle
This weather makes me want hot coco so bad. Even sloths love some hot coco in their life 😍
I dream of a world where farting audibly in public places is socially acceptable
Sometimes I just wanna grab my fat rolls and watch a good movie ya know?
I wish I could just take a redneck around just to make me laugh all the time
If I had a penny for every calorie I've ate in my after class snacks, I could pay for my entire school tuition
Girls complain about their poop lives while I'm living the dream pooping every 10 days or so. #SlothProbs
Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his knife.
Aww I'm blushing!! 😍 I'm too shy and awk for this 🙈💜
“@TeesMeta: #tshirt #tee Sloth Playing the Ukulele T-Shirt / Hipster Kids American Apparel Grass Green Tee http://t.co/7ibpamHv42” I NEED IT
Why can't afternoon naps be a social norm for all participants of life??
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