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Just sold an NFT of the concept of swimming for $16M to Kirk Cameron and now I can retire!
“Commander, it’s Jones, sir...yes, that Jones. Listen I’ve got the deep cuts obscure MLK quotes you requested for social media, but I’m not sure that will make you stand out from...yes, sir. Understood, sir.”
When you get your Child Tax Credit payment, just remember: Every single Republican in Congress voted against it.
.@realDonaldTrump I am an elector for the state of Nevada. I am a United States Navy veteran and I am homeless. You're suing me, an individual, for faithfully serving the people of Nevada. Whatever you think you've got, bring it. You will not win. You're a coward.
I can’t believe I misspelled tomorrow. I’m the worst.
If you’re gonna lie about Moderna being part of OWS in January (instead of mid-April) might want to make sure the @HHSGov website reflects your “new truth.” #GOPLiars hhs.gov/coronavirus/ex…
Wait... your dad knew we needed a vaccine for a deadly pandemic in January but still said it was just going to disappear for months?
Fact Check: This Moderna /NIH vaccine is literally the one that President @realDonaldTrump partnered with Moderna to create on January 13, 2020... I repeat January 13th, 2020. Just be happy. This is great news for America and for the world! 🇺🇸
There is a subterranean hyperloop that links Biden’s basement with a business in metro Phoenix
The weirdest thing to me are the right-wing conspiracy theorists who think everyone is involved in an elitist organized crime ring except their beloved leader Trump.
NEW: The Democratic Party of Wisconsin just put up this guide to where to find curbside voting & absentee ballot dropoffs in your city. Can you RT this far & wide? wisdems.org/curbside
“A lot of people cheat with mail in voting. I think people should vote with ID. Voter ID. I think voter ID is very important. And the reason they don’t want voter ID is because they intend to cheat”
Just killed 30 feral Hogs in my wine cave
Watching Jokic absolutely sucking wind in between every play is my favorite thing in the NBA right now. So relatable.
Your teeth are fake. Your skin-color’s fake. Your annual physical’s fake. Your bone-spurs are fake. Your taxes are fake. Your Time Magazine covers are fake. Your charity’s fake. Your university’s fake. Your hair looks like a big bowl of Chinese, “Bird’s Nest Soup.” Take a seat.
Because Nancy’s teeth were falling out of her mouth, and she didn’t have time to think!
My man... That's why I am running against him
I’m getting tired of hearing @Jim_Jordan repeating misleading statements. How about you?
Doug Collins sort of looks like if Dave Gahan had been born 150 yrs earlier and become a confederate lieutenant overseeing a POW camp.
Proud American Jew here saying this is beyond fucked up and Anti-American. Let’s get rid of this trash in 2020: SwingLeft.org
President Trump will sign an executive order defining Judaism as a nationality, not just a religion, thus bolstering the Education Department's efforts to stamp out "Boycott Israel" movements on college campuses nyti.ms/2P97cuv
The Expanse has a new home, but it’s as excellent as ever trib.al/JgklqhW
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