Michelle
@vibratingbee
no filter spam; at this point this is me just quoting my friends
Potrebbero piacerti
M: I think we should have booked the other Airbnb A: Why? M: It had a billiards table A: But we have our computers... 👇🤨😾 And *family*
A: I'll give you $100 if you can do the whole Stray Kid's "God's Menu" choreography *we pull up the choreography on YouTube* B: Wait, I'm one person, how am I supposed to do all this? A: I thought you were gonna ask that. Do you know that one Naruto move?
*talking about tasting one's bodily fluid downstairs* J: It's like when I have my 32g protein shake and I pass it to Jabi and he makes it 34g 🫣 🫣 oh hell nahhh
*group talking about cum jar then I bring up cum sock* J: Have you seen those videos where they're extra hard and the person is slamming it against a table *does slamming gesture* *I'm dying* 😭 J: Don't you know it's held up by an entire civilization??
I'M ABOUT TO KILL A BITCH THESE FRIGGIN CROC CHARMS WON'T SHOVE INTO THESE DAMN FUZZY CROC SANDALS I'VE WATCHED TOO MANY TUTORIALS ON IT ALREADY
M: K's dressed business casual because he's going to work after his frat party J: Don't describe such an innocent LAN party like that M: I want to go to a LAN party K: You need friends first 💀😭😭🥲
Me: Can I look inside of your belly buttons next time? I've been picking at mine K: Michelle, can we go back to having a professional relationship? 🥲🥲🥲
Me: When are you going to bed? Friend: I'm not sleepy rn but my sister's trying to force me into bed 🫣🫣
A: How do you know we haven't had sex? Me: Idk nor do I wanna know B: Bc we're playing League A: So? B: On a Friday night A: Ahh... yeahhhh... You're right
hold up is that my --
*in the car* Me: Can I karaoke? *me talking to myself trying to prop up my phone * F: Yeah Me: Shut up, I wasn't talking to you F: Oh fuck... Wait, you're right, you'd never ask me for permission for anything 🙄🙄
*overhearing coworker on FaceTime* A: I'm going to take a shower before we go B: Do it after we go to the festival, you'll get sweaty again. We're in a drought! Save water! A: It's okay, I have solar power *coworker and I die of laughter *
Today was my friend's first day of employment - Did you learn how to clock in today? > Yeah, it's not as fun as Spongebob made it look
*after my friend and I finished a match on osu!* "I think that song just rose my pp" 😳😳
- "I'm losing stamina, I need food" - Stand on this dick - "How much money do I need to pay you to stop making those jokes?"
*My friend checking out his jaw in the mirror* "Did you just see me fantasize about my jaw line? I didn't know there was bone there. I thought there was just skin and fat." 😭😭
"As soon as I get to your house, I'ma start throwing 20s at you... Like you do a specific line of work" -My friend who owes me $300 💀💀
United States Tendenze
- 1. #WWENXT N/A
- 2. Wemby N/A
- 3. Ford N/A
- 4. Chet N/A
- 5. Peyton Watson N/A
- 6. #TheRookie N/A
- 7. #kubball N/A
- 8. TJ Sabula N/A
- 9. Seton Hall N/A
- 10. Tre Jones N/A
- 11. Kansas N/A
- 12. #ThunderUp N/A
- 13. Weathers N/A
- 14. Reggie Miller N/A
- 15. Jaida Parker N/A
- 16. Nate Ament N/A
- 17. Dale Partridge N/A
- 18. John Blackwell N/A
- 19. Harrison Barnes N/A
- 20. #RHOSLCReunion N/A
Potrebbero piacerti
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University of California Esports Initiative
@UCEInitiative -
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Ray
@XraYnbowZ -
Limxyy
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yurbie
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Perkins SZN
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Jacob
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DD💎 | Turtle
@OoniTurtle
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