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Zak Trantor

@zaktrantor

Got roasted by old man Spragg today. Rasper was waiting at the gates so made like a banana and split. #LateForSkool


Earache from Bex has stopped now she can see the upside of working for Jock (as he calls himself). #MoneyTalks


Rat's footie team play semi today. Should take my mind off tonight for a bit. Don't know which of us in more nervous. #RoadToWembley


Mehdi Ramjam pitched up with 200 Pot Noodles earlier.Month past their sell by but who cares. Gave me a wink and was gone.#BeggarsnChoosers


McNasty turned up last night talking about a job at the weekend. Put the frighteners on me. Rat hid behind the sofa. #BadCompany


Met Froggie outside gates. He was green and holding his ribs.Skool was the last thing he needed.Knocked off and sneaked into UCI for the day


Seems like Bex and the CK now an item. She needs a bit of summin to take her mind off all the domestics. #DontBringHimHomeThough


2nd time in as many days Rasper's gone for me. Without Froggie this time so it must be me he's got grief with. #RunLikeTheWind


Rasper and his crew roughed up me and Froggie after skool. Escaped behind Mehdi Ramjam's garden fence. Nothing bad but a worry. #Clueless


Bex thinks I'm a bozo pocketing cash from McNuggets but how could he ever find out? Not like it's his in the first place is it? #RobTheRich


Wallet stuffed with £200 and a flash Rolex. Job done. Smile and a pat from McJockstrap. #HeWontMiss50Quid


Bex cooked us bacon sarnies then went to watch Rat play. Oppo striker giving him some jip. Lucky if he plays again this season. #BigMistake


Seems the Courtney kid didn't waste a sec. Hooked up with Bex in the Exchange today. The girl's smiling for England. #YoungLove


Gonna forget all the bad today. Me and Froggie gonna watch our beloved whites play. Dream of a cup run and Wembley tickets. #QueSeraSera


Cross-eyed Julie's been sticking her oar in. Asking round if anyone's seen the witch lately. Full slush puppy in her handbag did the trick.


Bex has been epic with the chores n stuff but there's only so much washing and cleaning you can expect girl can do. #ShareTheLoad


Proper roasting from McBagpipes in front of Bex and Rat. Told us straight. Wants his pound of flesh and happy take mine. #DebtsToPay


Found the Courtney kid. Got a tip from Mehdi Ramjam that he goes to Reckham. Knocked off early and waited outside the gates. #GiveADogABone


Me and Bex have got the household finances nailed. Dosh for the metre the rest goes on scran. #PotNoodle. Everything else we nick.


Froggie had proper shiner today. Swollen black and blue. Didn't ask him how. #OffLimits


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