#quotesfromsam search results

"I'm about to start concentrating solely on cougars" #QuotesFromSam


"That's because every girl is a crappy lock, and every guy is the master key." #quotesfromsam @sam_ellefson @mmcdonald_7 @Ashley_Reiner


The temperature outside is out of control #quotesfromsam


"Hey, if you peed on the aliens from Signs, would that kill them?" #QuotesFromSam


"That's like naming your fish Melissa!" #QuotesfromSam @Ssorsch


"I feel like a fat fucking whore today. I'm going to spit on myself later" #QuotesFromSam


#quotesfromsam: that's my SELFESTEEM and they just cut it the fuck off!!!!


"Can we go to BP? I'm a big fan of what they did in the Gulf." #QuotesFromSam


"I'm so cool I say guess what to myself." #QuotesFromSam


Me: whatcha doin babe? Sam: waiting for the show to come on with the dumb kid and the man with snowballs @LivLeppo #quotesfromsam


"Dude, I chugged that pizza." #QuotesFromSam


You read the book but I like to perform it on the animal - #quotesfromsam


#quotesfromsam: its not even to my nipples !


Did I tell you about that goat that I fell in love with? #quotesfromsam


Who are you talking to on Pinterest?? #quotesfromsam


#quotesfromsam: that bitch knew exactly what she was doing fuck that beautyschooldropout hoe


"I don't want people to be jealous because of my awesomeness." #quotesfromsam @SamaParr94


"I feel like I just had optical intercourse with this broad" #QuotesFromSam


"My motto in life: Drink until the problem is no longer a problem" #quotesfromsam


"I'm 20"- @ryanhoyng "Then why are you our age?"- @SAM_HICKEY4 "I'm not.... I'm 20" #QuotesFromSam


"On a scale from a slight pinch to a punch in the throat for how much I hate you today, I'd bite you. A firm bite." - #quotesfromSam


"Y'all are gonna be down one plate that I made cause I'm eating this one" - me on a cooking show. #quotesfromSam


"That's like naming your fish Melissa!" #QuotesfromSam @Ssorsch


@samuel_haton "Mr.****** has made me so mad that only Fifa should be able to do!!!" #QuotesFromSam


Here's a question, how do they get the red, white, and blue toothpaste to swirl. #QuotesfromSam


Martin Luther's wife - Coretta Scott Luther #QuotesFromSam


So, how do you trigger this event, without triggering the event...forget that, that's a rubbish idea. #QuotesFromSam #hackmcr


"no one ever waits for me, I live my life at a slow jog" @lil_hammy_sammy #quotesfromsam


She posts so much stupid shit why haven't I looked through it before. #quotesfromsam


He can't even distinguish the difference between a duck and a penguin because you fucked him up when he was one. #quotesfromsam


"Maybe gandolf will find me if I get lost in the woods and tell me he's gonna take me on and adventure" #quotesfromsam


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