The Butthole Files
@Butthole_Files
I cum, U leave
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The main difference between cocaine and 5 hour energy is that you can't do 5 hour energy off a strippers ass
I watched Porn on my smart Tv today. It was an above average experience
Being without power has taught me one thing. Amish people must have jerked off A LOT
Room service: can you bring us a turkey sandwich and a condom please
Farting in public with headphones on is a dangerous game
"That'll be a dollar extra if you want lube"
Fuck me with a ribbed lead pipe I just want to sleep
I got my first bj in a blanket fort on my birthday. Coincidentley so was my first game of duck duck goose.
You only get one for the rest of your life. Blowjobs or Cheese? Think carefully. Choose wisely.
Since the term "Eskimo brothers" invention, I have had sex with 35% more girls..to become closer to my "Eskimo Brothers"
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