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“”Blockbuster is block BuStEd” -@BrigidMarshall “” -@LLcoolscharf
Fuck 16, marry 6, kill 8
Fuck marry kill: AMC Burbank 16, AMC Burbank 6, and AMC Burbank 8.
I once cared about a girl so much I pretended to like dark chocolate
I need to have a "twitter presence" for my "writing career" so strap in for the occasional meme or movie opinion on this, my digital equivalent to Kevin McCallister's mannequin-and-cardboard-cutout pretend party from Home Alone
Took me longer than I'd like to admit to get the FOs one. #pitchjokes @anotherjenadams @LouieAronowitz @ChuckForSure @FlavorDept @buyingjason @StephKozi
"I love nature, it's so beautiful and majesti-" (Bug flies down throat, coughs, pukes, skunks appear to eat puke)
INSTEAD OF PUTTING UR KID IN A COOL BAND SHIRT - HOW BOUT ONE THAT SAYS "MY DAD IS INSECURE"
Would someone please escort the #WhooGuy away from the camera it sounds like somebody's making tea
.@thirstproject develops communities and works to unlock the potential of MILLIONS by building wells - It's sustainable responsible & loving
Star Wars merchandise will be our civilization's clay pottery fragments
"It's all hallow's EVE not all hallow's STEVE" - homophobic ghost
Business Idea: design an app using discarded vowels from all the other apps
If Star Wars was made today Luke would go over to the dark side to "try and change the system from the inside"
Now that this #DadBod craze has subsided it's me and my #RetiredFootballPlayerBod's time to shine
I don't know how to be clearer with OkCupid; I'm ONLY interested in dating someone whose name has adorable/punny wedding hashtag potential
I know the Terminator movies are science fiction but just in case I tell Siri 'please' and 'thank you'.
United States Trends
- 1. Indiana N/A
- 2. Mendoza N/A
- 3. Miami N/A
- 4. Carson Beck N/A
- 5. #NationalChampionship N/A
- 6. Curt Cignetti N/A
- 7. #CFBPlayoff N/A
- 8. Malachi Toney N/A
- 9. #iufb N/A
- 10. Abella Danger N/A
- 11. Heisman N/A
- 12. Natty N/A
- 13. Saleh N/A
- 14. Big Ten N/A
- 15. Fletcher N/A
- 16. #NeverDaunted N/A
- 17. Michael Irvin N/A
- 18. Raiders N/A
- 19. Big 10 N/A
- 20. Jimmy Butler N/A
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