Chris - One Day at a Time
@CompulsiveGam
My name’s Chris and I’m a compulsive gambler. My last bet was 24th July 2019.
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Today is one whole year since I last placed a bet, 1 year since my first GA meeting and 1 year since my lowest point. Some days are still a struggle, gambling still haunts my dreams, but I have the support of my family and GA, and it’s changed my life. Here’s to many more.
Really enjoyed our video meeting on Wednesday. Was a bit disappointing to only see 10 people when our room has 20-30 regularly, but we all agreed to reach out to at least one member to get them involved and see how they are. Feeling good despite not being able to leave the house
If people are self-isolating, please make sure you are communicating with others somehow. Talk through your thoughts, double your efforts, reinforce those barriers. Boredom and time with your own thoughts can send you down a dark path, keep talking 👍
In our GA group there have been two people who’s recovery seemed to be going really well and have gone back to gambling again recently. A real wake up call. Luckily they have reached out and not hid away from their problems. Really proud of them for coming back and opening up.
Seven months without a bet, still going strong. Found myself not tempted but curious today about odds. I caught myself before it could escalate and went back to reading a bit of one of the books. Got myself stuck into researching the new job I’ve applied for. Life can get better.
Hit my 90 days this week, trying not to focus on time but felt good receiving my pen. Some wise words from my GA group reminded me to stay focused and vigilant. Saw an advert about a bookie having new online features and found myself thinking about looking, but stopped myself.
3 weeks since my last bet, been a struggle but funnily enough the not-gambling has been the easiest part. Dealing with the finances and the guilt of letting my family down has been tough but we’re working through it. Looking to the future is keeping me going. One day at a time.
First Saturday of the English football season. It was quite liberating watching/listening to it all unfold without caring about most of the results due to a bet. I start caring properly next week about survival in the Premier League 👀
Good meeting last night, gave my debit card over to my partner this morning. Having no money on me is scary but I know it’s for the best. What I’m struggling with the most is how the situation and my actions are affecting my partner. Not having a bet is the easy bit right now.
Woke up feeling really low this morning. Got my second meeting later, and also seeing someone about my finances, which are both positives. Heads a bit all over the place.
First GA meeting today was incredible. Can’t explain the feeling, but I feel I have hope. What an amazing bunch of people. ❤️
Today I told my wonderful fiancé about the lies and debt I have been hiding for a year. I feel the lowest of the low right now. It’s hard to see a way back. Attending my first GA meeting on Wednesday.
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